Fellow liberals,
Nice job. We managed to convince Americans that we have the moral high ground. Can you believe it? Us! The ones who pee on crucifixes and call it art! We're suddenly the good guys. How awesome is that?
Excuse me while I do some blow.
Now that we're in power, allow me to say a few words to all the disillusioned conservatives and trusting Christians who took a chance on us last Tuesday.
Bwahahahahahahahahaha!!
Fools! Do you know what you've done? There's gonna be gay nude wrestling on every channel -- even the Disney Channel! We're instituting a law that illegalizes different-sex marriages, except in the case of human-animal nuptuals.
Marijuana will now be sold next to Blow-Pops in the candy isle of every 7-11.
Needle-weilding doctors will be given full access to hospital nurseries so that they may selectively harvest stem cells.
Effective now, we're cutting off all funding to Iraq and will funnel the money toward a program that teaches Evolution in churches.
That's just a sampling of what you can expect. Let the hedonism begin!
1 comment:
It's been 12 days and 8 minutes since your last post. Your writing is like crack. Need more please.
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